live like me!

Baby Leong

2011-10-28T13:07:00.001+08:00

I am gonna cook for baby leong tmr! :D

so excited!

sweet sweet dear

2011-09-23T19:32:00.000+08:00

sweet dear gave me a surprise last wk:D

he brought me to a special place and gave me an memorable evening.

Thank you dear dear! i love u! xoxo lots!

2011-06-01T06:42:00.000+08:00

today i baked. hmmm. shant comment. no spoilers.

the interesting thing is i woke up at 10 am and am still awake. going to bed ard 7 i think. other animals alr up.

omg. i jus recieved calvin leong's sms!!!!

2011-03-31T23:57:00.000+08:00

i think ppl dont see me as a human. i mean i have a temper too. u can joke and tease but dont go overboard! i snapped today man. and i am so not joking. wth. disclaimer. that was jus the polite version. vulgarities coming up next.
fucked up bitches. those fucked up bitches bring up stuff that i told them privately to use it to laugh at me. its okay if its all jokes and stuff but i mean u bring it up to sustain a conversation?!?! THE TOPIC OF THE CONVERSATION IS LAUGH AT SARA IXXIT! WAD THE FUCK! FUCKING WHORES! I WAS SO PISSED THAT I TOOK IT OUT ON A BIRD. ( i verbally threatened a bird).
PLUS I CANNOT STAND THIS PARTICULAR WHORE. SHE IS THE WORST FREAKING BITCH. I SWEAR AFTER THIS FUCKING UNI I WILL NEVER CONTACT HER AGAIN. FUCK FUCK FUCK! SHES SO SUPERFICIAL?! I DUN UNDERSTAND HOW SHE CAN LAUGH AT OTHERS WHEN OBVIOUSLY SHE MUST HAVE BEEN LAUGHED AT WHEN SHE WAS YOUNG!?!
i mean wth. jus look at her fucking face. how can ppl be so mean?!?! does demeaning me boost her confidence or sth?!?!?! she has no justification. AND SHE IS TARNISHING MY REPUTATION.

i hate it when ppl see me as this airhead. i have the fucking brains. i am in the same course as u fuckers. if my brain is small yours is too. YOURS MAY EVEN BE SMALLER.
i cant get accustomed to this lifestyle. ppl care too much about themselves. they are so freaking selfish. i need time to get used to this and build a wall between me and them. i will no longer view them as frens. they are my enemies. they will hurt me.

oh wells. at least i know i am still human. i can get angry. i jus fucking want to scold her u know. like slap some sense into her. shes smart but shes ugly inside. (oops shes ugly outside too). oh wells. i shall improve on my communication and maybe play revenge some time later. but now i need to study and get As to beat hers.

2 long weeks

2011-03-19T14:52:00.000+08:00

Time is something I will never have just enough. Its always too short or too long. Two weeks without you will kill me. Haha. But the thought of what is coming at the end is sweet. HAHA.

deardear i will miss u muacks!

(wonder if u still read this blog heh heh)

i am so mean.

2011-01-29T23:49:00.000+08:00

omg. i am damn mean can.
HAHA.
i saw this new newsfeed post (about r/s) on fb, and i couldnt help thinking to myself... EXPECTED!
HAHA!
come on la. that girl isnt even mature enough to take care of herself. I am not surprised the guy dump her. But i think maybe she dumped him since she got tons of suitors now!
maybe her internal beauty has gone up a notch. I am not sure since i've not seen her for damn long. But deep down inside i dun like her leh. i cannot stand her! HAHA. i am so damn mean! LOL.
i couldnt help but rant here man. HAHA. she is of same std as sheryl. lol. they can be best frens man!
both can seduce guys HAHAHAHAHAHHA

I AM SO MEAN! EVERYONE IS ALLOWED TO TALK BAD ABT ME! hahahaha

i hate rainy days

2011-01-26T17:02:00.000+08:00

Rainy days makes me cold and sleepy. I am so unable to concentrate in cold weathers. I jus wanna curl up and sleep. I need my blanket. Last night while sleeping i think i caught a cold. haha. Dear dear felt warm but i was freezing... I caught him waking up a few times. Did i kick him? I probably also inched into his space. Haha. dear dear of my dear dear. I love him so so much. Heaven would be here when I'm with him. I didnt get a chance to curl up in his chest last night (because bolster and pillow were in the way) but at least I got to slp with him. hahaha. dont think dirty. jus slp. purely slping.
Although this blog only has one reader and one audience, I think I should clarify cux this is still the internet and our pictures are on the blog.
The intrusiveness of the internet is one reason why I dont wanna make my blog public. Besides the content of this blog are generally more mushy and private. But I do enjoy typing my daily happenings and jotting them down.

Since I am such a scatterbrain jotting down daily events really helps me remember things and also makes dear dear to be able to gain information on my daily events.

I cannot wait for cny man.....

naughty me

2011-01-22T23:06:00.000+08:00

the explanation for the last post is that my period is coming.

so i went shopping. let me list wad i bought.

-a charles n keith bag for 53.50
-a grey top for 20 (at bugis in fact everyone of the following are frm bugis)
-a chiffon blue pokerdot top for 15 (we got conned could have gotten it for 10)
-a retro top for 20
-a retro lace dress for 20 at the same shop
-a pair of demnim shorts for 25 (at a very zhuai aunty shop.)
-a pair of high waisted demin shorts for 32.50
-a toga top at the same shop for 23 plus.
-a pink striped shirt with pocket for 25
-a hot lingere to prepare for cny (mahjong!) for 45
-a pleated colourful belt for 15 from that retro shop
-a grey polka dotted baggy top frm miss emily for 25
-a dress i bought with caishan at the dunno where shop. think ard 20 if i'm not wrong
-a grey legging for 13.90 at new look
-a pink chiffon top with frills at a ulu shop for 15
-a pair of earrings for 6 at diva
-a bracelet for 9 at diva
-a 5 dollar ring at nus flee

i think thats all.
i nearly bought a 38 dollar bikini. waiting for my fren to rmb she owes me one.
i also nearly bought a pair of 25 dollar shoes and a woolen hat. the hat suits my face shape very well but i thought it was a bit impractical in singapore. truth to be told my face shape suits hats. esp woolen ones. sometimes i'm very tempted to buy one but i know it will be left in the cupboard:(

2011-01-21T02:09:00.000+08:00

i'm becoming more unhappy recently. i dunno why.

I'm losing my personality and my confidence. I need to get them back.

and i quit chingay.

I think i really need a long break.
I jus wanna rest. relax. and not worry abt anything in the world.

I should set up a blog shop to sell my old clothes.
Maybe can advertise as 3 for 10 dollars or sth.
My cupboard is bursting.
I'm unhappy. What to do. What to do:(

and so i got back my results

2011-01-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

A freaking lousy score. but there was sth funny. i saw Cs and thought I got all Cs but realised Cs stood for Cores which were the subject type that i took. hahahaha. quite silly like how i thought F was gender.

I absolutely dont believe how anyone can do worse than me
lol. it was bad. rather bad but because i wasnt accustomed to the system and slacked and thought can pia at the end, i got these shit results. I think another factor is I am competing with competitive and smart people. People with scholarships and frm prestige schools. I have to work doubly hard.

I think I should quit dance. sacrifice abit. Work v hard this sem then play hard later. Dance is a hobby and will become just a hobby in future.
I dunno wads wrong with me leh frankly. As i grow older I am more reluctant to study. Why? I wan to set up a shop leh. seriously but i need the capital... So i need to work first.

Dear dear:( haiz. how? i dun wan be yr burden leh...

so i jus got my result for IT quiz

2011-01-09T18:31:00.000+08:00

It was disastrous. I mean i expected it but it still saddens me. Jus when i was so happy abt zou jie ming and dear dear this email had to come. oh man. its 20%. thats jus sad. but i think i would at least get 1% out of it right? so i would have 81% more to vie. but it was really bad. i dont ever wan to see such results again but i think i will still inevitably see it when my overall results are released.
I am pinning all hopes on my financial management. I dont wanna see my accounting paper ever again. if i get another low grade it would be from accounting or IT. i jus hope that my biz law will do relatively okay. so that i can at least get a B to pull up the IT and accounting.
Things aren't looking too promising. I would definitely have to buck up nxt sem. but i cannot help worrying about my results this sem. That being said, I know worrying about them now would be just crying over spilled milk but being human I can't help it.
Although I keep saying i would rely on u nxt time, I dont want to be a useless person. I want to be able to have the qualifications to help out in future and to lighten your burden. I wan to be a successful person as much as I want to be the woman behind you. I wan you to be successful just because its for you and not because that i want to rely on you in future.
My aspiration used to be a housewife. In fact I dont mind being a housewife in future, I jus dont wan to be a burdensome housewife. I want to be a smart and intellectual person. I want you to be able to hold your head up high and be proud of me.

In short, I wan to be someone that pei de qi ni.

so i went drinking

2011-01-07T23:19:00.000+08:00

i went drinking the other day. with grace and the bunch. well. the bunch means jy. mal. cs. as well as elmo and yikai. omg i gotta gush!
from now onwards whenever someone mentions yikai i'll imm think of the spread we had! 27 febs are smart ppl! they know how to cooperate man! we ordered a delux bento set which consisted of SALMON SASHIMI, CHAWANMUSHI (steamed egg), TEMPURA (shisamo fish, two prawns, two sweet potato, one large mushroom) AND MISO SOUP! and we had a CRAB SET! i dunno how to describe it but it was basically crab and soup. hahaha the soup tasted sweet and was nice! we also shared a side dish with grace! TONKATSU (back pork deep fried) YUMMY! and it DOES get better than this. EVERYTHING WAS HALF PRICE BECAUSE OUR DEAR DEAR DEAREST ELMO WORKS THERE! hahahahha.

~~(but of course vines was better)~~

and then we headed to wala wala because jy wanted to drink. well. she has a bf now. but she says she has not gotten tgt with him meaning he is still not her bf yet. but she makes out with him. in nus somemore. so i dun really understand how u can kiss someone if u dont love that person and if u love that person why u dont get tgt with that person. sometimes complexity confuses me. i'm jus happy me and dear dear are simple ppl:) we love each other we get tgt we kiss. simple. haahahha

anw the shots were DAMN GOOD! lychee margarita wasnt bad too! i wanna try grey goose nxt time. the name sounds horrible but grace says its smooth and tastes good. sex on the beach is nice. in fact DAMN NICE. hahahaha. we kept ordering shots of it. goooddd hahaha. i had fun man. nxt time i wanna go with dear dear. so he wont worry and i'll feel safe. haha. but maybe not so soon. maybe when i have my nxt hols ard in may. so my dear dear is more free and my liver can recuperate. hahaha.<3

new year's eve.

2010-12-31T13:35:00.000+08:00

while waiting to go out i shall jus type my new year's sentiments.

this year i met my love. and he made me believe in love. this is probably the only biggest event that took place this yr.
my uni was a wreck. i made new frens and for the first time didnt fit in somewhere. its weird knowing that u are outcasted and stuff. but its also quite cool because i learnt that they actually didnt matter. they are the insignificant ppl. this will be the last time i'm talking about them. time to let this go.
ytd i went to dear dear's pass out ceremony. he was damn cool can. hahaha. secretive ah. nv tell us got BEST IN PLATOON. AND SECOND BEST IN THE WHOLE BATCH OF 140 COMBAT MEDICS. hahahah. sorry must boast abit. he damn cool la. lol. the guy that got the best medic was damn enthu. dunno why also. lol. hahaa. its funny how dear dear puts in some effort (definately less than that lunatic) and eventually gotten 2nd. WOOTS. he is damn shuai. hahahah. but his mother and sis were around so i couldnt run and grab him right? hahaa. oh i tell u i wanted to run. jump on u. tackle u onto the floor and kiss u. hahaha. but cannot la. must maintain my image and must leave ppl good impression. hahahahha.
anw. i'm goin to shop now. and meet my dear dear. bye bye!

smile

2010-12-04T00:38:00.001+08:00

i jus did something that i nv tot i would have done. esp since my exams are like 11 days away.
The power of LOVE. hahaa

marriage

2010-11-27T20:24:00.000+08:00

I was thinking about marriage. How nice it would be to dawn a white gown and walk down the aisle. Up till recently I have never included the groom into my imagination. How wrong I have been. I realise that its not how pretty u look or how beautiful your whole wedding will be it is the person exchanging vows with u that is the most important. I think I am lucky enough to find one that I can trust and rely on:D
I am deeply in love now that maybe I can't think straight. I am only 19. I cant get married now! Haha. I have a whole life ahead! I wanna live life to the fullest. Be loved; Be hated; Be spoilt; Be wrong; Make mistakes while having fun. I wanna keep learning. Live is meant to be a learning journey. Enjoying the process while having a great time. But someday I will settle down. I will be nestled in the arms of the greatest guy in the world. I will do things that I would nv have thought that I would do for him. The thought is so exciting and thrilling that I cannot wait. haha. Who would have thought that I would be so easily won over by him... awww..... STILL CANT BELIEVE IT! hahahahahahaa

okay i'm going to swoon somemore. LOL.

deardearrr

2010-11-21T21:30:00.001+08:00

awww deardear i miss u alr... D:

places for gourmet tour!

2010-11-14T23:50:00.001+08:00

Oh dear! we have been putting our food tour for so long! Lets call it gourmet tour now!

On fb i saw pictures of food!
There is this shop "strictly pancakes" that i wanna go try!!!

hmmm nothing on my list now but this. so whenever i see some good food hunts i'll edit this post!

Pisces

2010-11-14T22:48:00.000+08:00

I think being a pisces has made me extremely sensitive. Sensitive to a point I am over reacting. Lol.

Like the past few days I've been having some fren probs but it turns out that they dont hate me and I'm jus being sensitive. (Actually i still suspect some hate me but at least the no. I suspect is going down and not up) lol.

And I cry alot. Damn it. Thinking back I cry for very small reasons. stupid. but that jus shows how much you mean to me. awwww... hahaha.

anw. I jus wanna say that I'm sorry I cry so easily and I hope you wont be irritated when I cry cux I jus cry too easily. i'm like porcelain darling. I bruise easily. HAHA.
Good analogy eh?
Anw I was done with my bix law tut. decided to hop in to type crap. lol.

Opps alr 10:47 and i have not bathed! lol. bye bye!

Do a step at a time...

2010-11-07T22:13:00.000+08:00

I got this:D

What about u?

happy 3 mths deary!:D

2010-11-07T14:14:00.000+08:00

YAY! 3 mths already:D so happy!
haha.
deary was v sweet last night:D he gave me a overdued birthday present and a specially handmade written card!
To all those that do not know him he is a very wood person. lol. Usually he cannot express himself properly so he wrote it all down!
omg so touched. super touched la. Gan dong ttm. hahaha.

oh wad to do he nailed my heart. I dun think my heart is ever leaving him. lol

i love u dear! Happy 3 mths!

2010-11-06T01:00:00.001+08:00

i think i need to stop feeling apologetic.

wake up call:(

2010-10-29T00:02:00.000+08:00

today i had a setback. hmmm. dun really wan to talk about it. (yes. that is how serious it is)

I think i really need to buck up. Everyday i have to learn new stuff and work harder than others. I must keep up with poly students that have already learnt half the things i'm learning now.
You see... I dun have an equal footing. Poly students have already learnt their basics during their 3 years and since our course is only 3 yrs long they cannot advance directly to the 2nd year because min uni life is 3yrs. Get the picture? They make me feel stupid. I must work harder to catch up and this is so much pressure. The grading system is also different so I must keep upping my game and not fall behind.

Wad will I choose as my major?
Top choices are financial banking, marketing and tourism.
FM is a realistic choice. but i'm not choosing it because i'm practical but because its a subj that really can reap big bucks. haha. $$$ minded?

Marketing will lead me to advertising. Something that I wanted to try in the first place. I want to create something. Something that ppl will forever remember:D I want to create the new "coca cola" haha. Something ppl will remember for as long as they live. Its like leaving a legacy behind. Guess part of me does not wan to be a normal person. I aspire to be unique and different. But I must admit I am too naive and innocent. I'll get bullied if I join the corporate world now.

Tourism. The reason I was lured into this industry because its so dynamic! Its always changing and constantly improving itself. I love it. I dun wan to grow old without using my brain. So I like creativity and besides mass comm i think the only place i can get it is here and marketing. haha. so how. wad do i do??? lol

haix i should buck up now first. LOL.

My biz law assignment

2010-10-20T17:19:00.000+08:00

I'm now in school with Cs. Shes printing notes. While i'm using my lappie to research on my latest assignment. Biz Law!
This topic is interesting. Its about cannibalism and the philosophies behind committing the act.
The act refers to a captain of this capsized boat killing his cabin boy for his 2 comrades and himself to feast upon.
Hmmm. wad would i do if i were captain dudley? Frankly under such circumstances, i cannot think straight. I jus wanna die. more than i would wanna live. lol. i'll probably puke if forced to eat raw human flesh. but under those circumstances i think i would eat him. then live each day as it goes. Eventually everyone would die if no help was rendered. So why not sacrifice one to improve the chances of survival for the others? But seriously, who would be so brave and unselfish to sacrifice themselves. Even if lots were drawn to decide who dies would the "lucky" person have the right to back out at the last moment?

So many thinks to weigh. So many options to choose. Wad should I write in this assignment?

so sweet!!!!

2010-10-17T20:50:00.000+08:00

they were like searching for each other when they got separated!

otters holding hands!

shoppp:D

2010-10-17T20:38:00.000+08:00

i love shopping. Today i bought a 10 dollar charles n keith belt. Its of a berry colour and about 2.5 inches wide. Love the colour but its not a v rational deal because i have nothing to match it with. But oh wells. Who cares. I love it. Thats all that matters.

Then puma was having this great sale and i bought a pair of sport shoes as well as a vvvvvv cool jacket. I love the jacket. It was like love at first sight. It was chic and cool. Gave me the air of a stuck-up celebrity and i like it. It costs 35 bucks:) The sports shoes were quirky. It covered the ankles giving the wearer a hip-hop feel. I dug it out. Literally. In fact I only found one side at first. The other was uncovered after a 5 min search. Hmmm.. not exactly my fav pair but it was the top choice in that circumstances and I really needed a sports shoe considering that mine has a hole already. Awww. It was even cheaper than the jacket. Only $30. Plus POSB card users were offered an additional 10% discount which was really cool.

Loved the items i bought and love the guy that introduced me to my items. Thanks deary:D

2010-10-16T15:04:00.001+08:00

yay:) i love my deary so much!

royal purple!

2010-10-06T16:31:00.000+08:00

YAY PURPLE!

good things must share:P

2010-10-06T15:18:00.001+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPXDvqA3GVA&feature=player_embedded

wonder how would calvin leong react. lol

sucks to be sick.

2010-10-04T21:00:00.000+08:00

I am determined to be happy. Whether am I sick or not. I am determined to not betray myself even if I feel left out. If I don't fit in actually it doesnt really matter cux at the end of the day we'll all lead separate lives. All I need is dear dear :)
already so reliant on my big black man:)

poor thing

2010-10-03T12:02:00.000+08:00

I think deary v poor thing. He is like so tired but he still spends his sat with me. Sometimes i feel that I'm being a lil selfish but I can't help it. He is irresistible. LOL.

Last night he slept only 2 over hours. Zombie zombie zombi-e bi-e bi!

I also v poor thing. not enough time. I got so much to do but so lil time to do. And my wisdom tooth is pounding with pain. I woke up because i turned and landed on my right cheek. The pain was so sharp that I shot up. Haix. Abit reluctant to see doc because I'm afraid that need to go through operation all that shit. I'm scared of all these, I openly admit, but I know that the earlier you solve the problem, the less risky and serious it gets.

OMG. I so dun wanna go to KTP or TTT. sobs..

:)

2010-10-02T00:46:00.000+08:00

I wonder how many ppl were heartbroken when we got attached. lol

Back in my junior boy days I was like WTH when he got tgt with the girl he accidentally hit her boobs.
Childish and love being childish.

Wonder how many people felt the pinch when Sara was taken and when Calvin was taken. HAHA. I can imagine girls cursing me. (I cursed at JB's gf)

haha. So interesting I should read psychology!

My newly baked cookies!

2010-10-02T00:43:00.000+08:00

Tada! This is the final product!

The second batch! The first batch looked nicer but I forgot to take a snapshot of it.

Too bad deary can't taste these... AWWW we'll do some again!

cookies FAILED

2010-09-29T00:52:00.001+08:00

I JUS WASTED MY TIME. shit. Cal wanted cookies to be softer so i delibrately didn't add so much flour. TURNS OUT I WAS WRONG. Its now chewy and soft. Nth like wad dear wanted. so sad. I shall try again tmr. This failure makes me v determined to make a good choc chip cookie.

i've deposited the edible cookies into the fridge in an attempt to make it harder. Futile? We'll jus have to wait and see...

Housewife!

2010-09-28T22:48:00.000+08:00

I wanna get married asap and have three kids so i can lose weight fast. And have a smaller generation gap with my kids. Then i wanna quit my job and wait for my husband to feed me (literally too).

HAIX. All so idealistic. All fiction and can never be made into reality.

Oh wells. I'll jus have to live with it.

This housewife syndrome all started when my fren commented:"You should not have come here to study! Jus quit school la and get married!" She also mentioned later that I should jus live off my boyfriend. HAHA. Funny.

Her mother told her that once you lay foot into the kitchen you are getting ready to get married. Then when I told her I cook for dear and baked cookies she was like HUH?! You getting married ah?!
HAHA! I stunned you noe! Dunno how to react for a minute! lol. Then started laughing uncontrollably.
Maybe I am getting ready to be the xian qi liang mu. Haha. My love for the kitchen is mainly deal with the old-fashioned thinking that mothers should prepare meals for their husband and children. Maybe I watched too much korean dramas already.

All this talking about kitchen makes me feel like baking again. I should just bake now. Hmmmm. Tempting. Except that I've Biz Law's slides to correct, FM tut to do, Readings for IT (vital for participation marks) and an Accounting Quiz to study for (nxt tues but i've not read a single chpt). On top of that I have yet to org my notes and tut.

Woah. SIAN TTM! I shall go bake anw. BYE BYE!

27/02/12

2010-09-21T21:21:00.001+08:00

I have never so looked forward to my birthday before. Esp if its 2 yrs down the road. Lol.

frens forever?

2010-09-16T21:21:00.000+08:00

I feel that as we grow older, it becomes more and more difficult to find true, close frens.
Why is that so? I came up with two possible theories.
one) we are less trusting of people
two) we lose the courage to pick up a conversation (thats my prob)
third) we jus dun feel the need to make frens. we become fake.

haha. Those above are from my experiences so yeah, i'm like that. haha! So be glad that u knew me when i was young! HAHA.

Anw i jus miss my tasmin. haha. i think seeing her for 2 consecutive days in a week then not seeing her at all is a little hard to get used to. lol. its funny but i miss the chilling after dance workouts and korean classes. Jus sipping my jasmine green tea and she drinking her pearl milk tea from our each a cup. Then making our way to the air-conditioned Junction 8 to walk walk or to shop. Haha. Its funny how we can jus buy anything together. Like without planning. Lol. Funny.

Awww. I miss alot of ppl now. Like having cs and mal and jy and even grace in my class and Wendii and Chengyan for sec dance or meetups.

And most importantly...
MY DEAR DEAR!

Where are u ppl??? Come back into my life man!

2010-09-14T23:01:00.000+08:00

i jus so love purple:)

the period is here.

2010-09-13T21:35:00.000+08:00

I was grumbling and snapping at everyone around that blocked my way or just stood in my path today. Then when i reached home, around 7 i realised that my period is here.

Haix. Mad mood swings.

can't help falling in love with u!

2010-09-12T19:17:00.000+08:00

i think my dear is my confidant, encourager, motivation and everything else. i love reading his comments. it always makes me feel less despair and more ready to take up challengers.

awww... i'm so in love with this idiot.

kiasu to the max

2010-09-08T12:50:00.000+08:00

i think some singaporean parents are too kiasu. I understand their worries over studies and all but i think its stupid to throw their money into the sea by sending their child to tuition that their child doesnt benefit from.
Take my tuition case as an example. My uncle wants me to go over every week to teach the p4 kid maths.

Take this:
The child scores 80 over to 90 marks everytime.
The parent wants 90 over to close to 100
The child has no questions to answering my questions everytime i go over
The child only wants to play. I feel that i am more of a babysitter than a tuition teacher.
The child keeps talking to me abt everything other than maths when I am tuitioning her so much that I have to leave her alone in the room.
The child is disappointed when i leave because I don't provide the service of playing after tuitioning. This makes me feel bad.

Whats worse is the parent doesn't believe that the child is on track. Although p4 maths is a walk in the park they need to give their child time to master the new subject and not demand full marks. Truthfully wad good does scoring good in exams mean in Singapore? Does it mean you are smarter relative to your peers? In school maybe yes. But in the real world, no. We need more social skills than just intelligence to get through hurdles. And I am so damn damn damn sure that my cousin will do well in life because not only is she exceptionally smart, she is good at striking good impressions. I jus wish that the ppl would stop wasting my time! I have a life too you know! If I am helping by making frequent trips there then I am okay with it but I am seriously wasting my time. The kid DOES NOT NEED MY HELP.

okay to re-illustrate my point I shall tell you what I do when I go there.
- opens a maths assessment book.
- instructs her to do this chp. (times her 10 mins for 10 mcq qs)
-leaves the room cux she is distracted by my presence. (she keeps making sounds to get my attention)
-comes back aft 10 mins. instructs her to do this and that. time her. leave the room.

WHAT THE SHIT IS THIS?! I can jus do this over the phone right????
omg. I am so exasperated. Her parent does not understand. Luckily he does not pay me or not i will feel so god damn guilty. But seriously this is wasting my time and money (transport fare)

okay. I have to go over today again. THIS IS MY ONLY FREE DAY IN THE WEEK MIND U.

First week in school and already so many things to do...

my life in nbs

2010-09-07T19:40:00.000+08:00

My iphone batt went flat this morning and i didn't even worry abt rushing home to get it charged. Guess the device knew wad i needed best- him. And by breaking down at that time it would allowed me to forget that he is not here now.

haix....

I am so dependent on him now for his presence. I must miss him but not miss him that much. lol.

Anyway I think school is a drag. My timetable is so empty that it makes me feel its meaningless to go to school. Like why the hell would i go to a two hour lect and head home after that? Its pure stupidity and waste of transport fare. I don't regret not staying in hall though (although the can-wake-up-late thing is so tempting) because the night life in hall is just too hectic and wild for me. I only have one nbs camp and the ppl there are overwhelming. They are all so interesting and fun to be with. But I cannot mix in. It jus doesn't feel right sometimes with certain ppl. Unfortunately those are the ppl I have to mix with. More often than not I am too lazy to make an effort to create conversations and to appear sociable. I jus wait for ppl to talk to me because I simply cannot click with them. They are so out of my league. They are not ppl from the world I am familiar with. Its damn sian to try to integrate into this world. I much rather stay in my comfort zone. But I guess I'm too protected. Too lazy too. And my energy level to make new friends and to know new people have diminished. My courage has also decreased. Seriously I feel left out sometimes. Sometimes I don't care but sometimes lonely.

haix...

Watever will be will be. School without my friends is jus not the same. I miss tasmin. chengyan. esp cs. Oh how i wish i could be crapping my days away with them everyyyydayyy. Fun. Now I can't even crap with the ppl I noe. IT JUS DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT.

I want to be more independent. More sociable and more aggressive. I need to be smarter. courageous. and really really more independent. I have been lucky my whole life. With a few setbacks and discouragements only. I must brace myself for days where there will be backstabbing and deceit played everyday. I must arm myself.

Dear I feel that I am too whiney and all. But to keep me sane I feel that only you and a few close frens should know who I truely am. And to those friends that are jus made. I am sorry but I can only reveal abit of myself. I am uncomfortable to be who I am infront of u guys because you wouldn't understand my personality. haha. I am cheerful. High and ridiculous at times. I am blur but not bimbotic. I am slow to grasp things and I love to stone. I wear my expressions on my face and cannot bring myself to fake a smile. I am not fake. Ironic that I feel that I have to be fake.

This is such an emo post that I hate it.

Pizza hut!!

2010-09-05T13:04:00.001+08:00

Hey hey!! Calvin and me are here at the bishan outlet!!!

We hope to continue our liar game SOON!!

I lubb lubb lubb u!!!

ME 2!!

impatient nature

2010-09-01T23:31:00.000+08:00

I can't wait for the day where we can fulfil all the things we want and agreed to do tgt: much awaited food tour, watching the series of liar game tgt, going for another round of helix walks as well as cooking for u:)

hmmm. i jus wan spend everyday with u. But i think i must stop lusting over u dear! haha. You are jus so DELICIOUS sometimes. HAHA. Sounds damn pervertic right?! See what you have turned me into! LOL. (am pushing the blame on you again. SORRY) BEASTLY.
We can be the beastly couple.

My dear INitiater who claims he is INnocent and that i am his INstigator, i miss you!
Although I have said this phrase a thousand times, i assure you its value never diminishes and I would never use it when I am not sincere.

The six days with you were like godsend! But i must not be impatient for my endurance will finally pay off on my 21st birthday when i can finally see you everyday:) okay. maybe not everyday. But as and when i feel like it. LOL.

Dear:) things you have to noe abt me

2010-08-28T12:22:00.001+08:00

Dear

Forgive me for giving you a scare ytd :(

You have to understand (or rather get use to) my sensitive nature. I'm a Pisces. Lol. The relation is that I'm super sensitive. Like to the max. Blur but sensitive to feelings directed to me.
And I've a huge flaw. I'm super impulsive. And even though i say I dun regret after making decisions on impulse. I noe I do. Dun ever throw me into an emotional array cux wad I do is affected by wad I feel. To a HUGE extent.

P/s: missing yr spaghetti! I keep boasting. Lol. Went home told py and jus told my father who is driving here. Haha. My bf can cook!

For calvin's curiosity

2010-08-20T18:50:00.001+08:00

It's funny how my frens are more excited than I am abt my changed status. I met jinyi n huimin ytd for a bit of 'sharing' session. I was afraid of being interrogated and asked those nitty gritty details which I didn't wan to share. But it went quite ok. Some questions I couldn't ans but it's interesting how they give me advice on things I shld watch out for in future. Lol. Quite funny though. I nv tot that such things could or would happen to me in future. I asked them for details but they say must trade secrets. Haix. They ask me hurry up. Lol. I'm kpo. But I fun like sharing. Haha. Can't imagine Calvin being beastly in future!!! Haha! They are implying that their bf's are! Lol.

My classmates are pretty curious too. Luckily for me my clique didn't turn up (in the end because of unforseen circumstances) so they didn't get a chance to grill me. I jus feel that some things shld remain private. That probably comes frm my nature of not bothering to explain.
On a brighter note, Hwee Hwee asked to see my dear's pic n said that he looks like a good person. Lol. She v pro can see frm a picture. Lol. Reliable n good. Haha. Then she say I look like a kid beside dear. Haha!!!!! I was wearing heels that were like nearing 8cm?! Haix. Lol. But she went on to say that like that good wad. Security. Haha. That I cnt agree more. Tall guys are jus so desirable. Lol.

Yuan Tat said I look more n more like cs. I was rather pissed cux he was shooting his mouth off like before. He was the one that amplified that I look v sao. Shit him la! Nv lend me liar game one too! Kick him! Hahaaaaa.

My iPod touch came today:) super pleased. I'm waiting for my mac!!!

Organizer

2010-08-14T11:29:00.001+08:00

I am goin to organise a class outing on 19 aug! I wan to make this a 1908 tradition:) every 19 aug we will gather for dinner and talk abt how our lives have changed in the past one yr. So fun right?! Hahaha. Zhou Cong said I'm too excited after reading my mass SMS. Lol. That idiot Elmo. Haha.

Then I'm org k box session at teo heng this coming mon! Haha. 7 princesses! But like before. Only 4 or 5 are turning up. We can't find a common date for all 7 of us. Lol. Cs suggested wild wild wet then u was like even harder to find a common day cux u have to avoid all 7 ppl's periods! Hahahahahahahaha.

My og Fren has organized this cable ski thing in batam. I wan organise one too! It's 102 including transport and everything! Sounds good lehx! I wan go with marven cs n Calvin. So wait two yrs bahx! Haha:)

I'm tentatively meeting min n fish on 19/8 lol. In the morning so it doesn't clash with class outing. Haha. So busy! But it's not enough! I wan fill up my tues, wed and fri! So restless!

I shall book mac on tues! Rawrrrr. Hahahahhaha.

2010-08-10T18:47:00.001+08:00

Dear cal. I miss u so much! And it has only been one day?! I'm goin to die. And. My bag. Sobs. No more le. I bought the black one. Haix. I much prefer the pink one though.

2010-08-07T10:06:00.001+08:00

Calvin leong I want to see fireworks!!!!

Work:)

2010-08-02T17:40:00.001+08:00

I love my work. Haha. It makes me feel smart. I love the sound when we pinch the calculators! I so miss my collegues!

And work always introduces me to new food hideouts. Today my lunch only 2 bucks la! And there is this v nice bakery shop in raffles city that specialises in cheese n raisin bun. Damn nicee! Plus I got to noe abt a shop in novena that sells good bubbletea:) sry but I've condemned koi. It's overrated n overpriced.

Now I'm goin to amk hub to buy my long desired coloured contacts!!! Ahhh. Chocolate n violet? Hmmm. Wonder if can try! Lol.

Work ended half an hour earlier cause I've nth to count. Lol. And I saw yiting today!

The late blogger

2010-08-01T16:12:00.001+08:00

Hi y'all!! I am the late blogger. Lol. Recently spurred on by a Fren of mine to create this lovely space for myself!

Recently I'm super into buying a pair of coloured contacts! It's like this shop in amk hub were selling it for 22 a pair. And buy two pairs get two free. V tempting.

It was the first time me n cal walked into a spectacle shop! Haha. Lol. (hao lian abit.) we v noob. Dunno wad questions to ask. Haha. It was only until I talked to cs then I realised that we must ask this n that. Lol. Okay. The deal was worthwhile. So. I'll get chocolate and some other random colour. Any suggestions?? I'm excited!

Anw. I went clubbing ytd! Shit. I like clubbing. Esp when it's free. Haha!

Ok. Tata for now:)